Inactive

ever read a book and are unsatisfied with the ending because you needed to read more?

maybe the ending of any great book is hard to let go of, WHY CANT THIS STORY KEEP GOING??

just a weird thought, as I ramble on about the last few months, I have had this air of inactivity.

who I aspire to be has been the same for 7 years. no question.

i have sort of been shut off lately in a way. Partly on purpose, I've been gaining some weird understanding about myself. About things handed down by generations. It's amazing, how far back some things can go. I asked a really hard question today. A question that will improve my life. I stood up for myself in a way. I took an initiative that the thought of doing had turned my vibrant soul into a cowering listless little sod.

thank you sculpture Gods?

tomorrow is another one of my great days off.

My plans are vast and unrelenting.

Rebeca Acosta list

My feelings
General feeling I.e. sad. Happy etc,

Intentions

Use of color

Use of material

Use of meaning

Body dismorphing

Femininity not used as a statement of womanhood but more for self identity ( self portrait.)

Implied movement . Very important. Think berninis David

Favorite inspirational things
Francis Bacon, pope paintings muscular studies etc,

Chroma phobia by DAVID BATCHELOR

movie, the Science of sleep. Which exemplifies the dissociation between reality and dreams that can occur, I sometimes relate to

Love me if you Dare. A movie about how immaturity and love can collide in a very disastrous manor.

Amelie, artistic romance classic, epic color palate

Catcher I the rye. Psychologically one of the most enthralling books I've ever read,

Nirvana,....need I say more

Wish I could be there : notes from an agoraphobic life. A very good book that challenges our fears and phobias and urges people struggling with compulsions to look to their past for answers. Basically stating that the answers or reasons for o see demons is within our own minds.

So this was an old list I made about things that I look to when I make a piece of work.

thingsies.

Talking to new people is exciting

feeling like at any moment im going to say something and you will realize I am a horrifying monster.

The world is an interesting place

I sometimes feel like I'm living 8 different lives. Where do they all collide? Will they ever?

Does anyone else feel like they have many different lives in different places at all times?

I'm being vague again.