viva con queso

I feel super cool and victorious lately. i dunno i have a really cool opportunity that I could have. FUNNY THING> i feel like i already have it and my hopes and dreams are so up up and up. I've been working so hard.
life is so insane but I can take it all in so much better now.
SUICIDE DRUGS DRUNk SMASH SMASH BANG FUCk FUCk...........this has been the last two weeks of what I have whitnessed in my surrounding life. and some point I start to look around and say well this all really isnt my problem. People can be ridiculously stupid though.

at the same time I have seen some serious beauty. ART>>>>>>>>not so much. well i just need to go to the met soon. to be honest i've been longing for it. Daffodils Holy God in heaven I love daffodils. Dogs I LOVE DOGS. and at passover I got to pet one like I was gonna love it forever because I took an allergy pill. Also someone helped me see a light within myself. I hadnt realized was there because people told me certain things that were very mean and that had kind of just stayed with me for a while. SOmeone told me I wasnt very generous or giving. this really took a chunk right out of my sense of self. SOmeone just made me realized that I am pretty giving and considerate. But I realized that my giving has nothing to do with objects or materials. I give of myself.

it's just funny how i never saw that.

excuse the existential self revealing feeling fun happy go lucky nice shit.
I love it!
and I love corny and cheesy and just all around silly shit.